Who am I, What do I like?

“There’s a scene in the movie Runaway Bride where Julia Roberts’ character

finally figures out that eggs benedict is her favorite way of eating eggs. It’s a

powerful moment because, up until then, she had spent her life eating eggs the

way her boyfriends liked them -scrambled, boiled, poached - never pausing to

ask herself what she actually wanted.

That scene stayed with me because it’s so much more than eggs - It’s about how we, especially as women, lose ourselves in the roles we play. As daughters, we chase our parents’ dreams for us, even if it means overlooking our own. As wives and mothers, our worlds revolve around the needs and preferences of our families. Somewhere along the way, we forget to ask: What do I like? What do I want?

FB Post Anupama S Joshi

I came across this post on Facebook and could really relate to it. I have been

there. For years, I also never asked myself what I wanted or what I liked. I just

went along with everyone else’s choices so as not to be “difficult”, to go along

to get along. I made meals even when I didn’t feel like eating. I made dishes I

didn’t particularly like because my children or husband liked it. I chose

restaurants and movies based on what I knew others wanted or liked, never

asserting my own choices or preferences. I thought I was “easy going” when in

fact, I was actually negating myself. As time went on, I became more and more

disconnected to who I was. I had no idea who I was outside of the roles I was

playing - dutiful daughter, accommodating wife, caring mother. Putting myself

last became my default setting.

This pattern also led me to become a people pleaser, a chameleon that

morphed with every new marriage or relationship. I had no clue who I was as a

woman, as a person. I was “daughter”, “girlfriend”, “wife” or “mom”. Those

were my identities.

Then life brought me to a place where I found myself alone - children gone,

divorced, both parents passed. It was only then I realized I didn’t know who I

was - who is Candace? The things and roles I derived my identity from were

borrowed from others. Suddenly my points of reference were all gone - I was no

longer “daughter”, being divorced meant I was no longer “wife” and with my

children being grown and leaving home even being “mom” was changing. I had spent so much of my life focusing on other people’s needs and wants that

suddenly having no demands or expectations placed on me left me feeling like

I was in a vacuum.

“This happens to so many women. We give so much of ourselves to the roles we play that our dreams, passions, and desires quietly slip away. And one day, when the responsibilities ease, we are left wondering: Who am I? What do I love?”

Anupama S Joshi

If you feel like you have been living for everyone else and have forgotten who

you are, I want you to know that it’s not too late. In fact, you are never too old

and it’s never too late. Through the teachings of kundalini yoga, I learned

practical, effective tools and a step by step path that brought me back home.

You are so much more than the roles you play. You are the writer, director, and

actor in this movie called My Life. Isn’t it time you wrote a starring role for

yourself?

If this resonates with you and you would like to learn more CLICK HERE to explore

my offerings and connect with me. Book a discovery call to see if we are a

good fit. At the very least you will leave the call with a personalized meditation

practice to dive deeper into your first steps back home to you - your original,

authentic Self.

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I wish you so much success in this new journey and can assure you this is truly the

beginning of the rest of your life. Create a life you love to live - a life of Joy,

Purpose, and Love.

Sat Nam!